How do you connect well with other people online?

I'm having the hardest time connecting with people online. In real life I have a lot of friends, but online I can't seem to make any. In the six years I've been active online, I've only made enough friends to count on my fingers and toes, and I have lost contact with a few of them. Even when I am trying to be friendly, a lot of people either ignore me, or reply negatively.





I had a strange experience once. I posted a youtube video, and one of the viewers posted a really insulting comment. I found the comment short of humorous though, and I replied with a comment showing this. The flamer not only replied positively, but he also added me to his friends list, and has never posted a negative comment on my videos again.How do you connect well with other people online?
i think it's much easier to make friends in person than it is online due to a number of factors, such as body language (which consists of 55% of how we communicate with eachother). consider the fact that most relationships are developped through consistant, mutual interest and that it is thus difficult to maintain meaningful contact with someone who may have completely differents interests and expectations regarding online communication. also, the types


of websites, forums, blogs, (ie msn, facebook, myspace, etc.) you frequent may not be suitable for your particular ';needs';. keep in mind, countless people are very guarded about who they communicate with online (i'm sure you're aware of the various sexual predator scandals which have occured over the years) and so, sometimes, despite ';everybody's'; best intentions, women may be very skeptical of communicating with men. All sorts of privacy issues (ie, facebook being accused of breaking all sorts of laws) have risen over the past few years, and so many people are very weary of befriending strangers online. The fact you've lost contact with a number of friends is likely due to the fact that alot of people grow cynical or emotionally distant in an online format, in order to protect themselves.


regarding your strange experience, i honestly doubt this individual cared for your friendship, and was simply looking to get a rise out of you (which he did). it's very easy for people to ';talk the talk'; online, being either bashful, self-righteous, racist, sexist, etc. It's much harder, however, for people to give a genuine, informed and constructive opinion on any particular subject, let alone, ';walk the walk'; .


i guess what i'm trying to say is that, in general, i believe that the information age has allowed us to ';connect'; with eachother on a completely superficial platform, which, in and of itself, is flawed beyond repair. i sincerely believe the world can do without the dissapointment and guess-work of developping online relationship with total strangers, and that we'd be much better off meeting people in caf茅s, at social events and gatherings, at concerts, wherever! despite the occaisonal murder/rape incidents, i think it's safe to say that in most cases, the best relationships are developped through non-verbal communication, sincere and mutual interest and human contact.


essentially, i'm not trying to discourage you from ';connecting'; with others online, but all the same, consider the evidence: you've got more friends 'real life' than you've made online over the past six years, and (i imagine) you've obtained much more happiness and satisfaction from the friendships you've made with people in person, and (i trust) these people have made it a point maintain their relationship with you, enlist their trust in you, and, most importantly, have gotten to know the ';real'; you, over time and vice versa. regarding your ';fingers and toes friends'; online and that youtube experience of yours, wouldn't you rather skip all the unnecessary work invovled in keeping a 'healthy, human' contact online, and live a real, sincere and fun experience with old friends and new?


lastly, i understand the idea of having 'lots of friends in real life' seems to justify your ability to make just as many friends (if not more) online, but either way, aren't a few, very meaningful friendships in 'real life' worth more than an abundance of e-buddies, even if it were relatively easier to befriend people online?


personally, i've gotten much more millage from the relationships i've developped in person, and have only, (as an exception to the rule) allowed very few people (1, maybe 2) from an online source into my life; but again, i have always resolved to be very VERY careful of those who have contacted me online and vice versa, and to never to maintain any relationship which had no future outside an online format, primarily because i believed them to be completely superficial (and perhaps even more risky) online.


(sorry for writing you a novel).